看板 joke作者 belleaya (台中李奧納多皮卡丘)標題 [翻譯] Polish Jokes 波蘭笑話集 (6)時間 Fri Jul 12 04:43:45 2013
好讀:
http://belleaya.pixnet.net/blog/post/32251727
這次口味真的很重
歧視味很濃
不過基本上就是把它當歐美對波蘭人的玩笑話看吧!!
不要起爭議
(1)
Q: How do you stop a Polish tank?
A: Shoot the guys pushing it.
Q: 要怎麼讓一台波蘭坦克車停下來?
A: 射死後面推車的人。
(2)
There was this Polish woman who just delivered a baby.
Her doctor came into her room
and saw her with a bag of ice in between her breasts.
Her doctor asks how come?
She says, "that's to keep the milk fresh."
(3)
Q: Why are there only two pallbearers at a Polish funeral?
A: A garbage can only has two handles.
Q: 為什麼波蘭的喪禮只需要兩個人抬棺?
A: 垃圾桶只有兩個把手。
(4)
Q: How do you know when a Pollack has been in your back yard?
A: Your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant.
Q: 要怎麼知道一個波蘭人在你的後院?
A: 你家的垃圾不見了,而你養的狗懷孕了。
(5)
Q: Why don't Polish women breast-feed their babies?
A: It hurts too much when they boil the nipples.
Q: 為什麼波蘭女人不直接讓她們的嬰兒吸母奶?
A: 因為加熱母奶的時候奶頭太痛了。
(6)
Q: How does a polack take a shower?
A: Pee's in the wind.
(7)
Q: How do you make a pollock crazy?
A: Stick him a round room and tell him to piss in a corner!
Q: 要怎麼讓一個波蘭人發瘋?
A: 把他關在圓形的房間,然後要他在角落尿尿。
(8)
A Pollack walked into a bar and sat down at the bar, where a news report was
on TV.
On the news a man was on a ledge outside an upper floor of a building
threatening to jump.
The bartender, who'd seen the news report before said,
"I'll bet you $50 he's going to jump."
The Pollack took the bet and put down a $50 bill on the bar.
Then the man on the ledge jumped to his death.
The bartender picked up the $50 bill but then, realizing that he'd taken
advantage of a poor, dumb Pollack,
his conscience got the better of him and he said,
"Look, I'm going to give you back your money. I have to confess that I saw
that news report before."
"That's O.K.," said the Pollack, "I saw it before too, but I didn't think he
was gonna do it again!"
一個波蘭人進了酒吧並在吧檯前坐下,而電視上正在播著新聞。
新聞中是一個男子站在高樓的窗臺威脅要跳樓。
(9)
The first Polish spacecraft was put into orbit with two astronauts.
One of them took a space walk to repair something on the exterior of the
spacecraft.
When he was done he knocked on the airlock's inner door.
And the other Pollack asked, "Who's there?"
(10)
Q: Why are Pollacks the only ones who eat shit?
A: They're the only ones who know how to cook it.
Q: 為什麼只有波蘭人吃大便?
A: 因為他們是唯一知道怎麼烹調大便的。
(11)
Q: Why do they they throw shit on the walls at a Polish wedding?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.
Q: 為什麼波蘭人要在婚禮時把大便丟在牆上?
A: 為了讓新娘身上的蒼蠅飛走。
(12)
Q: What does a Pollack use to clean salad bowls?
A: A bowl brush.
(13)
Did you hear of the polac who was told to blow up a car?
He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipe.
你有聽說被叫去幫車子打氣的波蘭人嗎?
他在吹排氣管的時候燙傷嘴巴。
(14)
Q: What's the biggest problem of Polish dump operators?
A: Shoplifting.
Q: 波蘭的垃圾掩埋場最大的困擾是什麼?
A: 垃圾會被偷。
(15)
A ventriloquist had just finished his Pollack joke routine
when a huge, drunk Pollack confronted him,
"I'm sick of your Pollack jokes and I'm going to knock the shit out of you."
"I'm sorry, it was all in good fun, " replied the comedian.
The Pollack retorted, "I was talking to little asshole on your knee."
(16)
A Pollack walked into a bar with dogshit in his hand and said to the
bartender,
"Look what I almost stepped it!"
一個波蘭人跑進酒吧,手上抓著狗大便,對酒保說:
「看我剛剛差點踩到什麼!」
(17)
A Pollack walked in to a pizza place and ordered a pizza.
The pizza man asked him, "Should I cut it into six pieces or eight?"
And the Pollack answered, "Cut it into six; I couldn't eat eight."
一個波蘭人到披薩店點了一塊披薩。
店員問他:「請問要切成六片還是八片呢?」
波蘭人回答:「切六片吧!八片我吃不下。」
(18)
Q: Have you heard about the Polish cocktail?
A: Perrier and water.
Q: 你知道波蘭的雞尾酒怎做的嗎?
A: 沛綠雅氣泡礦泉水和水。
(19)
Q: What's the most popular Polish fast-food restaurant?
A: Booger King.
Q: 波蘭最知名的速食餐廳是什麼?
A: 鼻屎王。
(20)
Q: Why do Polish airplanes fly so low?
A: So the pilots can read the street signs.
Q: 為什麼波蘭的客機飛這麼低?
A: 這樣機師才能看見路標。
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◆ From: 140.113.55.152
→ belleaya:看論文看到超煩的就想說來翻一下波蘭笑話~~2F 07/12 05:04
推 mobilx:好像越來越偏向單純人身攻擊了..6F 07/12 08:23
推 hydrant:BOOGER KING XDDD7F 07/12 09:05
推 ltser:Booger King XDDDDD8F 07/12 09:08
推 hirabbitt:「看我剛剛差點踩到什麼!」 <--笑翻9F 07/12 09:27
→ deadangel111:Q:IDF最重要的修復工具是什麼 A:寶麗龍
Q:當了一年的業參 你學到什麼 A:做假資料12F 07/12 09:58
推 newtypeL9:看我剛剛差點踩到什麼XDDDDDDDDDDDDD14F 07/12 10:08
噓 chx64:沒笑 滿滿的種族歧視味16F 07/12 10:38
推 KanoLoa:可以把波蘭換成鄉民,就沒有種族歧視了17F 07/12 10:47
推 Connec:波蘭人到底多討人厭啦XDDDD21F 07/12 12:00
推 d200190:會把這些笑話當真的才是真歧視22F 07/12 12:19
→ simongarden:"0 You're a girl OR Chinese."...24F 07/12 12:44
噓 bokez:不懂皮卡丘翻這個為什麼這麼多推,看了很難過25F 07/12 12:47
推 HornyDragon:Booger King wwwwwwwwwwwwww27F 07/12 12:56
推 f791026:推。會把笑話當真的才是真正的歧視28F 07/12 13:03
推 sylvy:有看有推!29F 07/12 13:19
噓 GLHF:不熟歧視波蘭 換中/韓如何31F 07/12 14:43
噓 asd6101:換成台灣人 還笑的出來嗎33F 07/12 14:52
※ 編輯: belleaya 來自: 140.113.55.152 (07/12 15:07)
推 Connec:換成台灣還是會笑啊 不過就是笑話是在認真什麼35F 07/12 15:26
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