※ 本文轉寄自 ptt.cc 更新時間: 2013-06-05 02:02:55
看板 joke
作者 標題 [翻譯] Polish Jokes 波蘭笑話集 (1)
時間 Tue Jun 4 21:22:16 2013
(含單字補充好讀版 http://belleaya.pixnet.net/blog/post/32209779 )
[翻譯] Polish Jokes 波蘭笑話集 (1) @ B E L L E A Y A 雜七雜八創作小窩 :: 痞客邦 PIXNET ::
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Polish Jokes 波蘭笑話集翻譯 (1) 前言：想到以前修孫維新老師的課「認識星空」的時候孫老師就有跟我們講過幾個波蘭笑話都蠻酸也蠻好笑的然後上網去搜尋才發現有好多波蘭笑話超好笑就來翻譯看看順 ...
![[圖]](http://pic.pimg.tw/belleaya/9a643033ad42518c0bbfccf1b617aa37.jpg)
Q: Did you hear about the Polak who thought his wife was trying to kill him?
A: On her dressing table he found a bottle of "Polish Remover".
Q:你有聽波拉克說他老婆想殺他嗎？
A:嗯，他發現在她桌上有一瓶去光水。(Polish remover，也可當波蘭移除者)
Q: How do you sink a polish battleship?
A: Put it in water.
Q:你如何讓一艘波蘭戰艦沉船？
A:讓船下水就可以了。
Q: What happened to the Polish hockey team?
A: They all drowned in spring training.
Q:波蘭的冰上曲棍球隊怎麼了？
A:他們春訓的時候淹死了。(春天冰融化了)
Q: Whats the difference between a smart Polak and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters
Q:一個聰明的波蘭人和一隻獨角獸有什麼不同？
A:沒有不同，都是神話生物。
Q: Why wasn't Christ born in Poland?
A: Because they couldn't find three wisemen and a virgin.
Q:為什麼耶穌不是出生在波蘭？
A:因為在波蘭找不到三個智者和一個處女。
Q: How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding?
A: He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt.
Q:怎麼知道波蘭婚禮中誰是新郎？
A:找穿著潔白的保齡球衫的就是了。
Q: How do you stop a Polish army on horseback?
A: Turn off the carousel.
Q:如何讓馬背上的波蘭軍停下來？
A:把旋轉木馬電源關掉。
Q: What does a polish girl do after she sucks cock?
A: Spits out the feathers.
Q:一個波蘭女孩在吸完雞雞之後會做什麼？
A:吐掉羽毛。
Q: How do you know if you're in front of a Polish firing squad?
A: They are standing in a circle.
Q:要怎麼知道你站在波蘭的行刑隊前？
A:他們會圍成一圈。(開槍時除了犯人也會射到對面的自己人)
Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell - he's still got a hand-grenade between his teeth.
Q:如果一個波蘭人朝著你丟保險插梢該怎麼辦？
A:快跑！ 因為那波蘭人嘴巴還咬著手榴彈！
Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a hand-grenade at you?
A: Take the pin out and throw it back.
Q:如果一個波蘭人朝你丟手榴彈怎麼辦？
A:把插梢拔出來，丟回去。
Q: How do you take census in a Polish village?
A: Roll a quarter down the street, count the legs, divide by two,
and subtract one for the Jew who catches it.
Q:如何在波蘭小村子裡人口普查？
A:丟個銅板在地上，然後算有多少隻腳除以二，然後減一，因為撿到錢的是猶太人。
Q: Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene?
A: Stanislaus the Fire Prevention Bear of the Polish National Forest Service.
Q:在波蘭誰會戴著森林管理員的帽子然後拿著煤油燈？
A:波蘭國家森林管理處的防火熊。
Q: How did the Polish mother teach her son which way to put his underwear on?
A: Yellow in the front, Brown in the back!
Q:波蘭人的媽媽怎麼教孩子穿內褲？
A:把黃色穿在前面，咖啡色穿後面。
Q: How do you know you're flying over Poland?
A: Toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines.
Q:如何知道你正在波蘭上空？
A:看到曬衣繩上曬著廁紙就是了。
Q: Why do Polish names end in "ski" ?
A: Because they can't spell tobbagan.
Q:為什麼波蘭人名字後面常會加"ski"(滑雪板)？
A:因為他們不會拼"tobbagan"(雪橇)。
Q: Do you know why the new football stadium they built in Warsaw
could not be used?
A: No matter where you sat you were behind a Pole.
Q:你知道華沙新蓋的足球場為什麼沒辦法啟用嗎？
A:因為不管你坐哪個位置都會被柱子擋到。
Q: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash?
A: The pilot got cold, so he turned off the fan.
Q:你知道波蘭有一架直昇機墜毀嗎？
A:嗯，那個駕駛覺得冷所以把電風扇(螺旋槳)關掉。
Q: Did you know that Russia just bought 12,000 Septic Tanks?
A: As soon as they learn how to drive 'em, they are going to invade Poland.
Q:你知道俄國剛購入12,000輛水肥車嗎？
A:嗯啊，他們打算學會怎麼開之後就去進攻波蘭。
Q: What's the motto of the Poland?
A: Every man for himself.
Q:波蘭人的座右銘是什麼？
A:自求多福。
Q: Why are there no ice cubes in Poland?
A: They forgot the recipe.
Q:為什麼在波蘭沒有冰塊？
A:因為波蘭人忘記做冰塊的食譜了。
Q: What happens when a Polak doesn't pay his garbage bill?
A: They stop delivering.
Q:一個波蘭人如果不交垃圾的帳單會怎樣？
A:垃圾車就不會把垃圾送給他們。
Q: How do you ruin a Polish party?
A: Flush the punch bowl.
Q:如何破壞一個波蘭人的派對？
A:沖馬桶。
(這個中文有點難翻，flush是沖馬桶，punch bowl是調酒，意指他們喝屎尿當調酒)
Q: What is long and hard that a Polish bride gets on her wedding night?
A: A new last name.
Q:一個波蘭新娘婚後會得到什麼又長、又硬(又難)的東西？
A:夫姓。
Q: Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?
A: They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born
in the world today is Hindu.
Q:為什麼波蘭的夫妻決定只生四個孩子？
A:因為他們讀報紙說每五個新生兒，就有一個是印度人。
Q: What did the Polish mother say when her daughter announced that
she was pregnant?
A: "Are you sure it's yours?"
Q:當一個波蘭少女懷孕，她媽媽會怎麼說？
A:"妳確定孩子是妳的嗎？"
Q: Why did the Polak sell his water skis?
A: He couldn't find a lake with a hill in it.
Q:為什麼那波蘭人要賣掉他的衝浪板？
A:因為他找不到湖面是斜的湖。
Q: Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside a theater?
A: They were waiting to see the movie "Closed for the Winter."
Q:你有聽說波蘭有一家子凍死在戲院外嗎？
A:嗯啊，他們是在外頭等著進場看一部電影「冬天本戲院暫不開放」。
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(英文原文資料來源： http://tinyurl.com/d4cp3wu )
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抱怨一下......痞客邦現在竟然會強制加廣告
雖說是可以用一些招式讓廣告不要出現在很醜的地方......
要出現廣告是ok畢竟用免錢的也怪不了人家
但是廣告也太醜了吧!!!
相比之下日本geocities的廣告就做得蠻美觀的
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推 :手榴彈combo不錯1F 06/04 21:26
推 :XD2F 06/04 21:27
推 :到底有多討厭這個國家 XD3F 06/04 21:27
→ :還有進口垃圾的梗 蠻有趣的4F 06/04 21:27
推 :有些梗也有出現在嘲笑其他國家的笑話裡 但是新娘新婚那個XD5F 06/04 21:31
推 :6F 06/04 21:32
推 :XD7F 06/04 21:33
推 :波蘭人是很笨嗎XDD8F 06/04 21:33
→ := =啊是有多蠢啦..........9F 06/04 21:59
推 :酸爆XD10F 06/04 22:01
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推 :XDDDDDDD12F 06/04 22:28
推 :有這麼慘嗎|||13F 06/04 22:39
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推 :酸欸16F 06/04 22:57
推 :機掰耶這個XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD17F 06/04 23:00
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推 :再推一個 這個推太少了吧19F 06/04 23:04
推 :讓我想起生活大爆炸20F 06/04 23:10
推 :足球場那個柱子(Pole)是波蘭人的雙關語21F 06/04 23:38
推 :酸爆了。那這樣醫學系波波怎麼辦？！22F 06/04 23:50
推 :XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD23F 06/04 23:56
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推 :GJ！25F 06/05 00:31
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推 :推~27F 06/05 00:35
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推 :30F 06/05 00:44
推 :太婊了吧31F 06/05 00:46
推 :柱子的梗是波蘭人!!!高調一下32F 06/05 01:05
推 :靠北這也太莫名奇妙了wwwwwwwww33F 06/05 01:27
推 :波蘭人到底怎麼了XD34F 06/05 01:32
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推 :歐洲人都蠻討厭波蘭這國家。。36F 06/05 01:45
推 :波蘭是被甚麼笨蛋病毒瓦斯炸到了嗎...37F 06/05 01:55
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